Jump to content
  • Welcome to AutoLanka

    :action-smiley-028: We found you speeding on AutoLanka Forums without any registration! If you want the best experience, please sign in. Safe driving! 

Recommended Posts

Posted

Your doctor has scheduled you for an autopsy on ___________ at _______ AM/PM. St. Amgems Hospital wants you to be prepared for what should be an eventful time. This guide should answer the most common questions in regard to your procedure. Please call your doctor's office if you have any further questions. Please remember, autopsies are performed on an "as needed" procedure. If you, or a qualified Medical Examiner chooses to cancel your autopsy, the Pathology department requires 24 hours notice.

WHAT IS AN AUTOPSY?

As advanced as medical science is, sometimes we need more thorough procedures to find out why your living status has been impaired. An autopsy can include CAT scans, X-rays, and surgical evaluation.

WILL IT INVOLVE SURGERY?

Yes. At times when there is a lack of obvious traumatic impact, surgery is needed. Your doctor may wish to examine your vital organs. This involves removal of the organs for the purpose of study. The contents of your stomach will also be examined, so we urge you not to take anything by mouth for 12 (twelve) hours before cessation of your existence or the procedure.

WILL IT HURT?

We certainly hope not. If at any time you're feeling uncomfortable, please feel free to alert the pathologist.

WHAT SHOULD I BRING?

We recommend a very large, empty suitcase. Ideally, your family should sign a "permission for disposal" form. If this has been done, you'll be provided with an effects bag and all unwanted matter will be disposed of in a device affectionately known as "Chuckie". It can also be helpful for you to bring anything that might have contributed to your current condition. This can include any drugs containers from medications you might have ingested.

WHEN CAN I RETURN TO WORK?

Not for a while. We suggest you worry about this after your autopsy.

WILL I HAVE A SCAR?

We take vanity in consideration. You may have a large "Y" shaped incision on your torso. There may also be some scalp incisions that can be covered by a competent professional.

WILL YOU LAUGH AT MY WEENIE?

Yes. Pathology is a profession fraught with stress and alcoholism. Your doctor may already have placed you in the Weenie Relocation Program (WRP) which means your weenie might end up in any number of body cavities, at the whim of your doctor. Should you not want us to laugh at your weenie, we suggest you dispose of it beforehand.

We at St. Amgems want your autopsy to be a positive experience and promise to treat your earthly remains with dignity and respect (aside from the weenie dealie). Please refer to our brochures "Cadaver's Bill of rights" and "So You're Dead. What Next?" for more information.

Remember, here at St. Amgems, our day starts when yours ends!

Posted
CELEBRATING MY 400th POST :)

Congratulation’s Mr.Dimantha, for your 400th post…. :):P

Posted

Which P2P do u use?!

im using BearShare n i downloaded lots of movies bt there r some problems . i downloaded scary movie 4 bt when i watched it its scary movie 1 .. anyway nw i have scary movie 1,2,3,4 :) ..

Posted

im using BearShare n i downloaded lots of movies bt there r some problems . i downloaded scary movie 4 bt when i watched it its scary movie 1 .. anyway nw i have scary movie 1,2,3,4 :( ..

Bro Gihan Scary Movie 4 is awesome :ninja:

Posted

Bro Gihan Scary Movie 4 is awesome :ninja:

It is not. It's the worst of the 4. And I was really looking forward to this coz Shaq had a role (Shaq, not Shak) It wasn't really funny. The funniest part was when Carmen Electra starts shitting and farting in the meeting room :( But that guy just lacks comedic timing. Cindy Campbell is still as stupid and funny as ever, but still.... disappointing.

Posted

im using BearShare n i downloaded lots of movies bt there r some problems . i downloaded scary movie 4 bt when i watched it its scary movie 1 .. anyway nw i have scary movie 1,2,3,4 :ninja: ..

why don't you boys try bit-torrent

can some bit-torrent users please post some torrent sites all the good one are shutting down cause of copy right lawsuits

Posted

Saw an accident near Open Uni last night around 10. A Mazda wagon, a 3-wheeler and a Honda. 3Wheeler was badly crushed. Not sure abt the driver has survived. Any info??? :(

Posted

why don't you boys try bit-torrent

can some bit-torrent users please post some torrent sites all the good one are shutting down cause of copy right lawsuits

Try PirateBay. The swedish police raided their domain host and took all the servers (including servers hosting other legit sites) last week due to pressure from the MPAA and RIAA. It came back in less than three days, with a server cluster now spanning three countries across Europe :alc: .

Posted

Ahh…Saw this yesterday…

image1180kx.jpg.

Posted

Ahh…Saw this yesterday…

image1180kx.jpg.

I've seen this 2 times as well... cool cab... is it a Chev Silverado? disel V8 with 350hp? :alc:

Prev... sell ur Rodeo and get 1 of these...

Posted

Prev... sell ur Rodeo and get 1 of these...[/color]

he is at cross roads... his choices are a bimmer 3 series or xtrail...

i would like him to take the x-trail but if that happens, it's breaking tradition...

Posted

I've seen this 2 times as well... cool cab... is it a Chev Silverado? disel V8 with 350hp? :alc:

i've seen it too but the spec is news to me...i seriously doubt an american V8 diesel cud put out 350bhp

Posted
Bishu pls see below....

2122bm.jpg

Thank you Fuzzo….I don’t know what has happened….. :blink:

Posted

I've seen this 2 times as well... cool cab... is it a Chev Silverado? disel V8 with 350hp? :blink:

Prev... sell ur Rodeo and get 1 of these...

:lol: Good one! .....

I've seen it too. Around Mirihana

Posted

It is not. It's the worst of the 4. And I was really looking forward to this coz Shaq had a role (Shaq, not Shak) It wasn't really funny. The funniest part was when Carmen Electra starts shitting and farting in the meeting room :blink: But that guy just lacks comedic timing. Cindy Campbell is still as stupid and funny as ever, but still.... disappointing.

yeap its not gud..

the best one is the scary movie 1

scary movie 1 - Super

scary movie 2 - Super

scary movie 3 - Super

scary movie 4 - Shit

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.

AutoLanka Cars For Sale

Post Your Ad Free [Click Here]



×
×
  • Create New...