Post-Whoring

Hola · June 16, 2006

Welcome to the forum & thats Nice Machine dude ..He He !!!

Bishu - u find this nice?

isurujosh · June 16, 2006

Bishu - u find this nice?

i think he is serious

Hola · June 16, 2006

i think he is serious

oh god...

windrider · June 16, 2006

serious or not.... its really funny....lol

Bishu · June 16, 2006

He He He >>

nadskit · June 17, 2006

Subject: Married life...

> TO MY DEAR WIFE:

>

> During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times.

>

> I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days.

>

> The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:

>

> 54 times the sheets were clean

> 17 times it was too late

> 49 times you were too tired

> 20 times it was too hot

> 15 times you pretended to be sleep

> 22 times you had a headache

> 17 times you were afraid of waking the baby

> 16 times you said you were too sore

> 12 times it was the wrong time of the month

> 19 times you had to get up early

> 9 times you said weren't in the mood

> 7 times you were sunburned

> 6 times you were watching the late show

> 5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo

> 3 times you said the neighbors would hear us

> 9 times you said your mother would hear us

>

> Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory

> because:

>

> 6 times you just laid there

> 8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceiling

> 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with

> 7 times I had to wake you and tell you I finished

> 1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move

>

> KEEP READING.......

> ==========================================================

>

> TO MY DEAR HUSBAND:

>

> I think you have things a little confused. Here are the reasons you didn't get more than you did:

>

> 5 times you came home drunk and tried to screw the cat

> 36 times you did not come home at all

> 21 times you didn't cum

> 33 times you came too soon

> 19 times you went soft before you got in

> 38 times you worked too late

> 10 times you got cramps in your toes

> 29 times you had to get up early to play golf

> 2 times you were in a fight and someone kicked you in the balls

> 4 times you got it stuck in your zipper

> 3 times you had a cold and your nose was running

> 2 times you had a splinter in your finger

> 20 times you lost the notion after thinking about it all day

> 6 times you came in your pajamas while reading a dirty book 98 times you were too busy watching TV

>

> Of the times we did get together:

>

> The reason I laid still was because you missed and were screwing the sheets.

> I wasn't talking about the crack in the ceiling, what I said was,

> "Would you prefer me on my back or kneeling?"

> The time you felt me move was because you farted and I was trying to breathe.

noaim · June 17, 2006

For all the ladies who have asked, "What is marketing?", the following analogies will help clear it up...

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."

- That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed."

- That's Advertising.

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed."

- That's Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. You get up and straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."

- That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed."

- That's Brand Recognition.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. You talk him into going home with your friend.

- That's a Sales Rep.

Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.

- That's Tech Support.

You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated toward the center and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!"

- That's Spam.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx-xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx-xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx-xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx-xxxxxxxx

SUC MI PAGODA

Cuntonese Cuisine

6969 Fellation Blvd.

Escondildo, CA 12698

281-6969

That's "Two ate one - Sixty-nine, Sixty-nine"

PORKING IN THE REAR

_________________________________________________________________

A LA CARTE

$2.69 each

CUM DROP SOUP

Fresh Every 2.7 Days

PEE YU PLATTER

Clothes Pins Extra

HOO FLUNG POO

Napkins & Raincoats Provided

SUC SUM TIT

Children's Special

YUNG POON TANG

No Take Out Orders Accepted

LUNCHEON SPECIALS

1. SUM YUNG CHICK..........$6.99

Different and Delicious

2. WON HUNG LO..............$6.99

Chinese Meatballs

3. SUM DUM FUC..............$9.69

Same - #1 But With Extra Sauce

4. CHU SUM TWAT............$16.99

Dinner - Parties Of 3 Or More

5. SUC MI PORK..............$9.69

6. Chef's Special FUC YU MAN...............$6.69

Specialty Of The House

DINNER COMBINATIONS

1. GOO IN HAND...........$9.69

For Those Dining Alone

2. GOO WEE CHICK.........$6.99

Sloppy Seconds - No Charge

3. CUM TU SOON...........$6.99

Order Early - These Go Fast

4. SUC MI WANG...........$6.99

Traditional Chinese Meatloaf

5. SUM DUM CHICK.........$4.99

You Get What You Pay For

6. FUC MEI SLO...........$6.69

Not Available After 10PM

7. LIK MI CLIT...........$6.99

A Delicious Lick Smacking Oriental Delicacy

8. CHO KON IT............$9.99

Not For The Light Throated

9. FUC SUM NOW...........$6.99

For Those In A Hurry

10. WAI TU YUNG..........$4.99

Not Available On School Nights

Overdrive · June 17, 2006

A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The chicken runs to the farm but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's Mercedes back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the chicken and horse were playing in the meadow again and the chicken fell into the mud hole. The chicken yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab for my 'thingy' and pull yourself up." And the chicken did and pulled himself to safety.

The moral of the story:

If you are hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks.

Heard this before but it was an ant and an elephant.

the moral of that story was if you have a big D*** you don't need a mercedes. more or less the same thing!

Overdrive · June 17, 2006

For all the ladies who have asked, "What is marketing?", the following analogies will help clear it up...

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."

- That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed."

- That's Advertising.

4. SUC MI WANG...........$6.99

Traditional Chinese Meatloaf

5. SUM DUM CHICK.........$4.99

You Get What You Pay For

6. FUC MEI SLO...........$6.69

Not Available After 10PM

7. LIK MI CLIT...........$6.99

A Delicious Lick Smacking Oriental Delicacy

8. CHO KON IT............$9.99

Not For The Light Throated

9. FUC SUM NOW...........$6.99

For Those In A Hurry

10. WAI TU YUNG..........$4.99

Not Available On School Nights

Good one machan!

dwiz · June 17, 2006

He He He >>

Man you can say that again, Isnt it a lawnmower or something?? What ever it is its an awsome setup

Overdrive · June 18, 2006

Where exactly is this thread going? Haal kolla you should be posting this sort of thing on the "post whoring" thread. Just don't open a topic for the sake of it.

Cheers. :

ruwds · June 18, 2006

Bro,,,From Where did U download the Movie .....

from torrents (p2p)...yet gotto check it out whether its fully there...hehe...can never trust torrent downloads..

Hola · June 18, 2006

apooo virus

ruwds · June 18, 2006

apooo virus

torrent is not limewire, kazaa...so less risk of virus...plus...i know many ppl using torrents (not limewire and that kind of applications) and even i hav used torrents for few months and not yet gt any virus probs...

well anywayz cant say hehe...

sharkster · June 18, 2006

noaim · June 18, 2006

noaim · June 19, 2006

torrent is not limewire, kazaa...so less risk of virus...plus...i know many ppl using torrents (not limewire and that kind of applications) and even i hav used torrents for few months and not yet gt any virus probs...

well anywayz cant say hehe...

Machan it aint viruses u gotta worry about... Its Adware & other softwares that get installed by itself.. Use Windows Defender Beta 2 (downloadable from www.microsoft.com), and check for urself, i installed bearshare or something, and i didnt even f**king use it, already adware and other cronic softwares had got installed! :| ...

ruwds · June 19, 2006

Machan it aint viruses u gotta worry about... Its Adware & other softwares that get installed by itself.. Use Windows Defender Beta 2 (downloadable from www.microsoft.com), and check for urself, i installed bearshare or something, and i didnt even f**king use it, already adware and other cronic softwares had got installed! :| ...

Well Bearshare is also like limewire and I dont use them...I know friends who use those p2p software have got different problems... I use BitComet and get torrent files and download the file through it...

thanks about adware and stuff...I will keep a look out for them. Depends on the site you get the torrent. Most of the time for example its jus the .avi file thats in the torrent and so no other softwares come with it.

anywayz thanks...

GihanFX · June 19, 2006

yeah if u have any Anti Virus software ur safe from viruses bt the main problem is the spyware's and adwares trust me u cant remove them u have to format ur Hdd.. cus it happend in some of my cliant computers and those softwares automatically disable ur firewall.. and another thing do not install any ActiveX controlls form the internet ... and Limewire , Kaza are not gud softwares bt bareshare is ok and im using it still no truble bt 40% of downloaded files are contaning viruses.... and now im using torrents thanks to ruwds bt the downloading speed is very low ... anyway no viruses adwares or spywares

xXx · June 19, 2006

Machan it aint viruses u gotta worry about... Its Adware & other softwares that get installed by itself.. Use Windows Defender Beta 2 (downloadable from www.microsoft.com), and check for urself, i installed bearshare or something, and i didnt even f**king use it, already adware and other cronic softwares had got installed! :| ...

very true stick to torrents boys. no hassel what so ever. bu the problem is all the good torretn sites are shutting down coz of copy right issues. can some one sugget couple of good torrent sites