Your Horoscope

[noaim]

ARIES

You tend to be headstrong and deliberate in your actions. Basically you don't give a f**k about anyone. Most people hate you but you couldn't care less. You're the type of person who would masturbate at a wedding

TAURUS

Warm and caring are your most endearing characteristics. You get on well with most people because you're bisexual. You hardly ever wear underwear and you constantly smell of piss.

GEMINI

Your star sign denotes an air of duality in your character. Simply, you're a neurotic schizophrenic. A real f**king weirdo, the type of person who'd kill them self to win a bet.

CANCER

You have a businesslike attitude to life and a knack for making money. You're an unscrupulous bastard who would sell relative's limbs to buy a

mobile phone. You are likely to be murdered.

LEO

The adventurous type, always looking for thrills and willing to try anything. In other words, stupid. You have the IQ of a garden snail and will never amount to anything. Most Leos are living on the welfare.

VIRGO

You like the good things in life and you know how to enjoy them. But you're prone to bullshitting and you're a cheap bastard. Virgo men are usually queers and the majority of Virgo women are whores.

LIBRA

You are the forgiving type and you don't bear grudges. This makes you an asshole. For your entire life people will make a complete prick out of you. Nobody will go to your funeral.

SCORPIO

You are sharp, a quick thinker and good at puzzles. However these are your only good traits. You screw small animals and love picking your nose. You should become a stunt performer with no helmet.

SAGITTARIUS

You are the romantic mushy type, soft-hearted and a lover of the arts. You are likely to import Dutch pornography and sex toys. Men even willing to rent Sleepless In Seattle to increase your odds for a romp in the sack.

CAPRICORN

You are deep and personal in your thoughts, the quiet type. A mean self-centered c**t and a closet homosexual. Your best friend is probably an altar boy.

AQUARIUS

You are the academic type and will probably end up working in the legal system. This means you are an absolute pervert, at the least a transvestite. Your ideal sexual partner is a Labrador puppy wearing fishnet tights.

PISCES

You are the eternal optimist, seeing the best of any situation. You have no grasp of reality and live in a dream world. Most people consider you to be the greatest living moron. You will continually fail. You're a prick.

[mariner]

WTF is that?? Let's just say I'm the complete opposite of mine

[fuzzo]

man i got a shock when i read mine... then i read the others and saw that they were all along the same lines *phew*

[Kim]

i was lik ' WOT da hell? and then reading others at a quick only realized '

[AMG]

man i got a shock when i read mine... then i read the others and saw that they were all along the same lines *phew*

Me too....Damn..

[GihanFX]

CAPRICORN

You are deep and personal in your thoughts, the quiet type. A mean self-centered c**t and a closet homosexual. Your best friend is probably an altar boy.

Aiyo Mava Kala,, Kad Kudu bt im not this kind of person, n i saw another article

Saturday, 1st April 2006

CAPRICORN

Your Weekend: Today, instead of a forecast I want to present you with a psychological skeleton key. Using this simple technique you can open any door and solve any problem. Are you, after all these years, ready to finally learn the secret of successful existence? Er... largely, actually, it involves ignoring all promises of instant transformation and immediate enlightenment! Actually, all you really need this weekend is to take less seriously people who are asking you impossible questions and making unfeasible promis

ERRR bloody hell today is a great day for me,,